To go or not to go to the…. American Country Music Awards

I got amazing news the other day!!! I found out I won tickets to be in the front row of the American Country Music Awards!!!!  I was ecstatic because I knew that meant going to the NFR and having another fun time in Vegas!!! Then… reality came back.  We just spent thousands and thousands of dollars for our wedding.  I have a a lot of bling on my left hand and my dress was all bling and the blinged event meant $$$$$$$  so would it be smart to spend another couple thousand to have more fun in Vegas?  We were just there not too long ago but I know being front row (which I was all summer long at country concerts) is so much fun!!

It is funny because Tim likes to take credit for my love of country… haha!!! Umm….noo sweets, my love of country began way before I met him.  I had a friend in High School that was an amazing barrel racer and I used to travel to rodeos with her.  I would ride the school bus home with her and do chores in the barn so that we could go ride.  It was a different life from what I had known and I loved every second of it.

We have been so so many concerts over the years and have basically seen everyone. I have personally met so many artists including Luke Bryan, Kip Moore, Trent Tomlinson, Thompson Square, Rodney Atkins, Jana Kramer, David Nail and many more. Toby Keith and Brantley Gilbert both have my bands (bracelets) and I have pics! 🙂

To go or not to go?

Well I had such a savings built up that I really went out and spent a lot this year. We have worked so hard over the years and have always traveled and had fun but kept a savings as well to add to our retirement. I thought I was going to die long ago so when I got better I spent a lot of the money on trips, travels, and things I just wanted to buy.  I mean, you can’t take it with you right?  hahaha it’s mine!! We have no credit card debt or any debt.  We now have medical bills we pay and have a separate account that selling bands or any contributions have gone to. Now I am getting better and pushing myself, I think  ‘Well hell, if I had lived like I was dieing and sold everything I had and just went hard, I’d be dead’  I am still alive, so that would suck not to have a place. Can you imagine?  It’s like people who thought the world was ending months ago and then you wake up and your alive the next day and are like $%&# …how am I going to pay things now?  I have no monies and no home?  For me, that would be a deadly mistake.  I have monthly bills and my alternatives every month are very expensive. We have to pay insurance monthly.   DC is a very expensive place to live in but we have worked for it.

I cannot feel bad for anyone who complain, financially speaking, because you make your own path in life.  We chose to move out of Michigan because everyone in the state could see many years ago it was going downhill. We wanted more out of life and although I had a great full-time job and we were doing well, we wanted more. The only reason we would move from place to place is because I accepted a better job and had to move.  I have nothing against people who don’t have a lot but live within their means and make the best of what they have and don’t complain. I do have a problem with people who complain and ask for money because they choose to have children because they want others to pay for them and they don’t want a job or to better themselves.  If your job doesn’t pay enough, get another one. Take on multiple jobs and be responsible.  We have more going on than anyone I know with medical bills and what I’m going through with a huge loss of income that I brought in but you won’t here me complaining about all of that because …I know what it’s important is that I am still alive and have someone I have to live for.

So basically, I think it would be a more responsible decision to not go. That would mean more days off work and we already have other travels this month.  I have chemo, other plans and heading back to Michigan for Christmas all in about 2 1/2 weeks time… so an additional 4 days off?  Ouch.

Anyways, tonight I am not going to the National Christmas Tree Lighting like I have every year for the past several years.  I did receive tickets and gave them away to someone special that had always wanted to attend, although I love going… these two people were very deserving and just so grateful to receive the tickets. 🙂

I have been feeling alright this week.  I am ready to see some people tomorrow at another hospital who have not seen me since May! They will probably not recognize me with how far I have come!! haha always love shocking people when they see me and go ‘REALLY?! Stage 4 metastatic everywhere pancreatic cancer, really?!’  hahaha!  I have some left side pain but nothing a little oxy could help with (and has!) and I feel fine! 🙂   I hope everyone had a fabulous day!

xoxo  ~Ash