Hang in there babe

Just hold on Ashley

So Ashley has been through so much her body is tired and weak yet still fighting. The hospital has done all they can for her. Some doctors will tell you it’s in gods hands now. Others will say “you are dying” I told Ashley they are tired of waiting you are too tough. We ONLY listen to the ones that are positive and tell all others how it is and to get OUT Ashley even told one your old you are dying. Love her Fire. They also have her on a Do not resuscitate which pisses me off I have argued with them about this tell I was blue in the face she still is fighting and has a strong heart. Told them to get their shit together because if you don’t resuscitate her you will be the one that needs resuscitated. This should be the family’s Decision to make not your doctors. So Ashley has fought off her Sudunomas infection in her blood and bladder with the help from her antibiotics of course doctors I think thought she was a goner. Her body has been able to wall off the leak with scar tissue and essentially incapsulated every thing bad. Lucky the surgeon had the JP drain on the top and bottom of this spot so it is draining the waste with the pseudomonas,enterococcus faecalis and klebsiella bacteria. The surgeon was very happy that it was draining and had walled off the bacteria/ infection. The body is fighting back to protect itself. We think the leak is in the spot were her blockage was in the small Intestine right after the duodenum. This is also the same spot her stent is in the transfers colon by her Fistula. It is leaking again at or Near the stent in the colon this would explain the klebsiella bacteria (This is very common genus of bacteria that thrives in humans living in the colon and are beneficial for normal digestion but can cause life Threatening health problems if they invade vital organs ). The pseudomonas bacteria can come from a very wide range of things. ( Most commonly from catheters,patient to patient interaction,hands,unsanitary equipment,and lack of cleanliness at hospitals). And the enterococcus faecalis (this could be a soft tissue wound infection post surgery). These bacteria are very dangerous for my wife because she was already very I’ll /immune compromised person and can cause death fast. She is on a wide array of antibiotics and will stay on these for some time. She has been very lucky and is a metrical so far that she was able to fight these infection and that the drains are working. My great clients Mystique and Jeff that I have been working for has helped out in so many ways not only are they understanding about me not getting their job done and leaving the custom library 3/4 done, they bring me dinner almost every night. They even brought me groceries to take home because I didn’t have time because I was trying to work and get back to my wife asap in the beginning. And last night we started to read all your great cards to her to lift up her Spirit. Ashley took to heart what the one minded Ass of a Doctor told her “you are dying”. He must god because the last time I checked I thought he was in control. I told him you are entitled to your opinion but we have talked to a hand full like you. We believe she will heal and just get stronger with time so get OUT. At times I feel like nothing is uncontrolled but then the infection is GONE a metrical maybe or is this god at work? I think Ashley is a fighter and I will push her to the end. So the hospital is trying to force us into hospice in Arlington Virginia. I almost went to look At the place because they keep talking about it like they are forcing us to to go there and die – not going to happen. I feel like we will get more of what Ashly needs at the hospital on the regular floor. For example today she was low on blood so they gave her blood within two hours if we had to do this at hospice it would probably take three days if they would give her blood that is not sure. Hospice is geared towards Palliative care pain management and spiritual things for end-of-life. The hospital is geared towards making you better and that is our goal. So now we have a battle in front of us to try to stay at the hospital . I will do every thing possible to make her better and that is a fact and She will never be alone.

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Mx4zgTvnVh8&feature=related

44 comments on “Hang in there babe

  1. Carolp says:

    Never underestimate the power of prayer.

  2. jane says:

    God Bless you Tim. We stand behind you in your courageous battle and believe only you and sweet Ashley know what is best. I pray every night but tonight I will get down on my knees in prayer for this amazing woman who has helped so many of us. Let Ashley get as strong as your love!! With you both in spirit from Toronto – jane

  3. God bless you Tim for fighting for your Ashley. Some drs. are such asses, and they don’t know everything. I pray for Ashley and you, that she has the strength to pull through,and that you keep helping here fight the fight. Both of you are my heroes. Xoxoxo

  4. So glad to hear from you, Love how strong and positive you both are. Miracles do happen and we are claiming one right now for you both!!! Love you. Janeen

  5. Rebecca thiel says:

    Ashley and Tim my thoughts and prayers are being sent your way! And Tim you tell those doctors how things will be done! Don’t let them tell you how to run things. Only you know what’s best for Ashley! I love you both lots and keep praying everyday that Ashley will be healed and recover from this cancer. Ashley has kicked this cancer in the ass so many times, I doubt she won’t do it again! And when she does we will have that big celebration you’ve been talking about Tim! :-). Again love you both, and my thoughts and prayers are with you both!

  6. BobbyJo says:

    Prayers coming for both of you. We will also light a candle for Ashley and pray that she heals. You both are amazing and have inspired so many with your love and faith and determination. God bless you both.

  7. Tracy says:

    I love your attitude Tim! Never give up, and hold other people’s feet to the fire! You & Ashley got spunk- Love that about you both. I get it as I was my dad’s advocate and had to listen to the naysayers too…and they are so annoying and down right in your way when you are trying to remain positive and proactive…Kick them to the curb!! You don’t need them, not now or ever…

  8. Donna Cesare Ciallella says:

    Keep up the fight guys. Sometimes you just gotta tell the doctors EXACTLY what you think. I keep praying for you and Ashley. She is such a little fighter–she has to pull through. When she does, if I were you, I would be afraid of that tough lady. She has more fight in her than most people! Stay strong!

  9. Sheila says:

    I have followed both of you and never found the courage to comment. You are both incredible and when I listened to that song, I had to write. You are both in so many hearts and prayers. I think of Ashley every day and want to thank you for being there for her and for continuing to share her battle with us.

  10. Lola says:

    Tim you are an amazing husband and support. Everyone should have someone like you in their life. Praying every night for you and Ashley.

    Sharon Lola Antonio

  11. Linda Gary says:

    Tim and Ashley – prayers and love coming your way from Oklahoma! Thank you again for keeping us posted – you are both so inspirational to all of us and doctors do not have control of miracles – God has the lead in that department! My best to both of you – Linda

  12. Angela Searcy says:

    They tried to force my husband into hopice, saying that the insurance company wouldn’t let him stay in the hospital but his Oncologist kept him there until he passed. As long as one of her doctors can keep her there, she will be ok. I agree, Todd was only 44 and while I knew his time was upon us, I didn’t want him to suffer, which I believe he would have done in hospice. Hang in there, she will let you know if/when it is time. They did a DNR on Todd and didn’t even tell me, I saw the big red sticker on his chart. I called them out on it and they said the doctor can do that. Todd was still lucid at that point so we had the doctor and the head nurse come in and modify what they would and would not do. Keep pushing, scream if you have to. The Purple Stride is coming up in Nashville, and I am doing it for Todd AND Ashley!

    Angela
    Nashville TN

    • Chris says:

      Angela, I am sorry for your loss – I feel it acutely – but hospice is not some inferior form of pain relief. It is – if done right – far superior to a hospital. My wife died of pancreatic cancer in hospice last month. A hospital could never have provided the level of attention or care that the hospice did. The nurses always responded within seconds. Even the best hospital can’t do that. Also, in the hospital, they were very conservative with pain meds – not so in the hospice. Losing someone close can never be pleasant, as you have experienced, but hospice is not the enemy when it is time.

  13. Jane says:

    Tim, and Ashley,
    Your love determination, will power and fighting spirit has got Ashley this far as well as a whole world of people praying for you. If anyone can pull off a miracle it’s you two.. Keep fighting. Prayers and love coming your way. You are both amazing!!

    Jane xx

  14. kduguay55 says:

    Prayers are always being sent your way!! To your clients Mystique and Jeff: you are amazing- You are doing more for Tim and Ashlee than you can imagine. Thank you for being great people!!

  15. Kristen says:

    Keeping fighting, Tim. I don’t think the doctors or the hospital have the right to put Ashley on a DNR or force you guys into hospice. Those decisions are family decisions that are made between the two of you. The doctors and nurses should support that. Maybe you should consult a lawyer about what they are trying to do. I will keep sending many prayers your way. Ashley is a fighter! Don’t give up.

  16. Ken says:

    Hang in there you two. Keep telling Ash to keep up the good fight,
    that God is on her side and will see her through this!

  17. Mini says:

    Tim the song you posted is what we feel for you and Ashley. Keep fighting because as long as there is life, there is always hope. Wishing you the miracle you, and others fighting these horrible diseases, deserve. Always in my thoughts & prayers. Xxxxxx

  18. Ann says:

    I’m sorry some of the Drs are being unsupportive jerks. Hospice can be a wonderful thing if you don’t want any more treatments especially because you can bring your pets but it’s clearly not that time. You and Ashley know what’s best for her no matter what they say!

  19. elaine mclaughlin says:

    Thanks so much for letting us know what’s going on. I think we all believe that the hospital is THE GET-WELL place,and if you have enough money you deserve to and can buy wellness. It’s not that way ,is it? Sometimes you feel like you’ve been thrown into a lion’s den or snake pit and you have to defend yourself from those who you think are supposed to help you, on top of having to get well. It’s not that the medical folks don’t do what they’ve learned to do. It’s just that you are not guaranteed the product you think you’re paying for.Both sides are frustrated by the illusion that doctors MUST cure you. That’s why I think you are smart not put it on the doctors to determine your fate, but to use them to help you make your decisions.It is very hurtful and alarming when folks talk right in front of you as if you’re gone. It assumes no hope, miracles, or turn in the right direction from some new idea. You know better. You, know you’ve been right when doctors were wrong,and the strength of the body has been seen to rally,even when it didn’t make sense. Your experience with the benefits of hope have been different than theirs.I don’t mean pie in the sky hope. I mean that it is helpful to accept the possibility of wellness outside the regular protocol. People can carve you up as much as they will,but the patient’s God-given body has to right itself. I feel like you see yourself as the dragon slayer who HAS to save the princess. The princess has to depend on her own strength to fight the dragon,but having a wing man is extremely helpful. When I was sick, there weren’t many on my side,and even if there were, I wouldn’t have expected them to make me well. If I’d have had that support though, I wouldn’t have been so angry, in despair and suicidal. Providing that support can get a patient through the difficult times, the long waits,and the unsuccessful ideas and help them support their own body’s ability to get well. You both have certainly stepped up to the plate in this area. We’re pulling for you.

  20. Raye says:

    You are right to fight to keep Ashley in the hospital. Also it is the family’s decision on the DNR. She’s a fighter we are praying for her and you. Xoxo

  21. juliemarathongoddess says:

    We are with you Ashley, no one fights alone. Keep fighting like the warrior you are. You have a giant purple army behind you and God on your side. We are with you and WE GOT THIS!!!! Love you so much. xoxoxo ❤

  22. cathy says:

    Tim God bless you both stay positive I will pray hard for you both xo Cathy

  23. Elle says:

    Love and prayers to you both:)
    Stay strong..keep fighting..we love you guys<3

  24. chester11f says:

    Always in my prayers!!! Stay strong!

  25. Sheri says:

    Keep fighting!!! NEVER NEVER Give up!!!

  26. Tiffany says:

    No chance in h*ll you let the Drs. tell you what to do NOW!!! You guys have charted your own path thus far — and have had the surgery! (no matter the outcome, the fact that you fought and got it means you won!) — and have beaten all odds…these Docs have no clue who they are up against.

  27. I don’t think I like hospice. My mom was there six months to the day and they quit feeding her. They said it was her time to go. Who says? She ate ice cream on a saturday and that’s the last thing they gave her to eat. On Tues they gave her morphine and she died. I felt like they killed her spirit. I guess when you have to go, you have to go. but I thought the whole hospice experience was fake. and there was nothing glorious in death at all…not at all. This just happened last week so maybe I will feel better about it later but I am not there yet. You tell my Ashley to hang on as long as she wants to. God will take her when he is ready. amen!

    • and I should add….God is not on our timetable. he is on his. Tim I feel for you and Ash and the situation you are in. Talk while you can, and decide things now. If you don’t need em later, hey that’s okay too. We don’t know. I hate to give you false hope. but my aunt lived 30 years at stage 4 breast cancer. Why? we don’t know. 30 years and then she got hit by a car! She died within the year but we all knew it was the accident that got her. So go figure. and she was the best person I knew. RIP Nancy.
      I love you both!

  28. Teresa says:

    Tim you are such an awesome guy. Just the right person to be there for Ashley. My Husband of almost forty yrs passed away from stage 4 pancreatic cancer Oct 18 of last yr. I was his 24 hr a day advocate. He was diagnosed the first wk of July. We did not have much time for anything. I would have loved to have talked to him more than we had but meds kept him from doing that. His last ten days were spent in the hospital. I truly believe that everything that could be done for him was. In part I also think that is because I was there 24/7 and never left his side. I did have to put several drs and a nurse in their place because of the negatives. Ashley will be just fine with you on her side. My Husband had just turned 60 and never been sick except for appendicitis in the 70’s.
    God is the only one that knows. On going prayers and positives for the both of you.
    Love to you both

  29. mandy says:

    Hang in there Ashley!! We all love you such much honey!! Tim you are amazing and Ashley is so lucky to have such a strong man looking after her needs, the songs you posted brought a tear to my eye, I love that music and they are perfect songs. Stay strong Tim and stay with us Ashley, you can beat this honey xxxx

  30. Rachael says:

    My brother is fighting this terrible cancer too and is getting treatment at the Cancer Treatment Center of America (Philadelphia), and has done amazing. I wish you could get Ashley there, this place is truly a wonderful institution which really does treat the whole patient including the family. He has done remarkably well. His hometown doctor “gave” him 5 months to a year to live… The Cancer treatment center of America has a different way of thinking… they focus on living not dying. His cancer in the lymph node, lung and liver is now gone and his pancreatic tumor has gone from 9.9 cm to 2.3 cm all in about 7 weeks. His chemo does not make him deathly ill and he and his wife’s outlook (along with mine – a former nurse) is amazing. I have never seen a place like this in my life.
    As for your wife’s infections, you are so correct. I cannot tell you the number of times I had caught the aides emptying catheters without washing their hands….
    Our prayers are with you both and I wish you both the best. God will determine when the time comes and not the doctors, one day they will figure this out.
    All our thoughts and prayers are with you and we will include you two in our weekly prayer vigil that we hold for my brother. It is without a doubt that God’s intervention, prayers and CTCA are the ones making a difference in his life and with God’s help all of the prayers you are receiving will help you and Ashley. I hope those reading this do not think I am doing a “commercial” for CTCA, I am just giving my testimony to the outstanding job (and of course God’s intervention) that has been done for my brother. As they said he will never be healed but we are praying for a full remission and I pray the same for Ashley. Please don’t give up, we had a patient who was septic and was removed from life support as the doctors said she wouldn’t live. She made a full recovery…. Please never underestimate the power of God!

    God bless you both.

  31. Kym says:

    We’re praying for you both, God is in charge and will help you both through this! XO Kym

  32. Kary Parker says:

    Hey…..
    Glad to hear the infection is decreasing/gone. The antibiotics are doing their job and sounds Ashley’s body is still fighting and trying to protect her, and that’s a good sign for sure! Hoping today brings more progress for Ashley =o)

    Take care……….Kary
    Hope Faith Courage Strength

  33. cathy says:

    Prayed in church today lit a candle in Ashley’s name fighting girl stay strong love hugs and prayers

  34. Donna says:

    There’s a beautiful passage in Isaiah 55: 6-9. “For My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways My ways. As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways and My thoughts than your thoughts.” It is not for us to know or understand some things in life. That is God’s job. Your love for Ashley will guide you to do what has to be done so that she does not suffer. May God grant you the strength you need during this trying time. Prayers will continue to be lifted up for the both of you.

    • Carolp says:

      Donna, thank you for the Isaiah 55 verses. They reminded me of another verse – Isaiah 40:31 “But those who wait on the Lord Shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint”. Tim, the Lord is in control – rest in Him. We are all praying for Ashley.

  35. gray says:

    Im a Rn…former hospice Rn as well. Hospitals and doctors dont have authority to make DNR decisions if conscious patient and family do not sign. Thats illegal. I actually found myself on the other side of hospice when my brother was dx at age 43 with stage iv pan can. I fought against hospice and told those doctors i knew what they were thinking….i’ve been on both sides now. Dont give up or into to them. Without fighting, my brother wouldve been taken sooner. He did go on hospice the last 5 days of his life, but he know it was his time and made his peace with his Savior. Hospice is a great service when patients and families are ready…and being at ones home is better than that hospital. Ive been praying for healing and comfort for yall. Yall really feel like my family. God Bless.

  36. Hollie Stewart says:

    Tim & Ashley, I pray every morning & night for you both. God is using this trial as a miracle. Look with your heart, and you’ll see miracles all around you. I love the scriptures sent and Ashley makes me think of David in the Bible. As a youth, David FACED the giant when all others said it was impossible. They gave up & conceded defeat. But with GOD’s power, David RAN toward the giant & defeated him with a stone. No fancy shield or protection, no mighty weapons, just FAITH and belief that GOD would deliver him.
    God WILL deliver Ashley. So many days I prayed for God to let me take my Daddy’s pain for him…just one day to let it be me. My heart breaks for you Tim. But believe this, you will be stronger than you ever imagined. I know from going through my Daddy’s fight with him, strength comes when you need it. God is good and he does deliver.

  37. Heidi says:

    Dear Ashley and Tim:

    You both are in my thoughts and prayers.

    Ashley you are young and strong, you’ve been through a lot, but remember YOU have the power within you, “Body Heal Thyself”. Ashley you are my hero, keep the faith!! Miracles happen all the time, ask and you shall receive.

    Toby and Tank want their Mommy back home. You have a wonderful, amazing and loving husband,Tim: he needs you too!!!! Stay positive and keep fighting. 🙂

  38. Sandy says:

    We are praying for Ashley that she keeps fighting this. The hospital is the best place now. Hang in there. She has gotten better before.

  39. Sandy says:

    Tim, I met you at the Apple Festival, Niles Mich..Ashley is so lucky to have you in her life.

  40. Darlene thiel says:

    Tim, your Dad and I Are so proud of the Man , Son you have become, just keep fighting for your Beautiful Wife as you have been Doing! We Love You Both!

  41. stargirl says:

    Ashley – you have our strength with you, pulling for you, healing you! You are bigger than this and are overcoming it. Turn away those whose intentions are not in your best interest – doctors are not gods, they are human and can make mistakes. Holding you in my positive thoughts and warm prayers my friend. Good job Tim looking out for her and keeping her positive – it makes all the difference. Peace to you both.

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