My 150th post!! :)

^^Calendars for sale!!!!! If anyone is interested my friend Michael who I’ve talked about before is selling them.  We receive treatment at same place and he is Stage 4 Pancreatic as well. He has found his hidden talent in painting and has made a calendar of his first 12 paintings (which are fabulous!) and he is donating the money to the wellness center in which we both go to.  The wellness center provides services to us such as counseling, yoga, art therapy, reiki, and support groups. Great place for cancer patients all in which is free for us!!  The cost is $20 for the calendar, e-mail me or comment if you are interested in buying one! 🙂

Can you believe my friends harassed me into starting a blog as I began to get better when I had no idea what to say or write about or even how to do it and I’ve posted 150 times now daily since the 1st of October?!  Crazy! 5 months and almost 1000 followers??  Wow! 🙂   I will be changing this website up next month though.  I will have it layed out different so people that really don’t care about my life can just go to the tab about the things I do from cooking to recipes or juicing etc. and well, I am not going to write all about it but just expect changes. 😉

I am just so grateful for the amazing people there are on this world and many of whom don’t know me in person.  I mean to get such nice e-mails and such when I post that I am not feeling well or having a bad day, it just really makes me appreciate everyone.  It is amazing to me that when something so tragic happens in your life like say… my diagnosis, the people that are there for you and the people that come into your life which most are unexpected.  You can think about it and think ‘well these people… because they  are family… and this person because we are bffs’ or whatever but when things happen, in many cases, it’s the opposite of what you expected.  The people you thought would be there aren’t and the people you never imagined are and you meet or communicate with people that never knew you prior.

Yesterday was a wasted day to me.  It started at 6:30am at my CT scan – waste because my doc cares more about a PET scan and I will write in simple terms the difference tomorrow.  Then I am in the cancer unit waiting forever for a prescription, actually 2 but they only gave the one and forgot about the other and I said forget it… it wasn’t that pertinent that I needed to wait another 2 hours.  Then since my hospital doesn’t stock this script, I head downtown (DC) to the Walgreens that I know does and they have to verify the script… took hours because my Dr. was in the clinic. UGH! It was WAY too cold to walk all the way to where we parked to fill the meter so I had to take my chances on a ticket – no ticket amen.  Then going to the Justice Federal Credit Union to cash a check in which they do not cash and the whole process of that was forever and a day so what a WASTE. Oh, my husband needed plumbing supplies for his client and the place we went to clear across town, a plumbing company, didn’t have what he needed.  I’m like of coarse not, I mean they are a plumbing company… why would they have plumbing stuff?  …. just one of those days!!!

By the time I got home I was EXHAUSTED!! I took my 10mg Oxycodone (for pain I was in) which normally wakes me up and energizes me and I’m not sure if for some reason these ones did the opposite plus running on 3-4 hours of sleep or what.  I crashed so early last night during The Bachelor: Women Tell All… haha.  I also felt so gross sick yesterday.  I don’t know if it was the contrast or what,  I don’t recall feeling like this after my other scans but who knows.  I felt like I do when I get chemo and nauseas and tired and can’t eat but hungry.  Just nasty.  I am better now though!!

Today I grocery shopped all morning and did running around in which I wanted to get done before this expected snowstorm they are talking about tonight.   I got to the Wellness center at 11am and didn’t do the art therapy because it was the same time as ‘Living with Chronic Cancer’ group but it was good!  It was good convo with Michael as well whom I’ve talked about before.  We have become better friends because of this detour that we both happened to go on in life and no one really understand what it’s like to go through this and chemo and the tests, office visits, worrying about blood counts, unexpected things happening etc.  unless you’ve been there.

After Michael and I had lunch I headed home and kept shutting my eyes while I was driving… I have no idea why I was so tired.  I feel like it’s my new oxy although the 5mg that I would take 2 of would pep me up and I had plenty of sleep last night that I woke up before 6 today ready to go.  Weird! I had to get home and get to work with the list my husband gave me for business stuff.  Now it’s time to relax… ahhh!! Ready for some snow too!!! Woohoo!! 🙂

xoxo ~Ashley

VOTE. Vote to END cancer.

I voted. Did you?

haha.  We can all wish that we can vote it away right?  Damn.

Love.

OH.  Here is the blouse I’ve aaaaaalways have wanted to buy but just couldn’t justify a $200+ blouse just to wear for political reasons that some of my friends would argue with me about.  So I just admire it online…

Well after voting I figured hmm… I can either get some ice cream, crawl into bed and just cry/eat my life away.

I mean when you hear:

 Your Stage 4 pancreatic cancer is still in your pancreas, liver, lymph nodes, abdomen, cervix, stomach, bowels and on your ovarian cysts..Chemo WILL be administered Monday, no more time to wait.

…you don’t exactly smile.

OR not.

I went with the second option.  BRING IT ON.  I will not be defeated.  I have too much to do than sit and sob.  I actually have a life and a damn good one I am going to live, fabulously that is 😉  Apparently this cancer has NOT got the memo of who exactly is was messing with.

Anywho, my Tim has been a sick dude.  I remembered when I was first diagnosed he didn’t want me to see another human being for fear they had sickly germs that would hurt me and now I am living with a sickly guy.  It started Friday and we thought ok you’ll be over it by Sunday.  When we were in Philly we got him some meds and I even wanted him to stay back and not join us at the pancreatic event but he said “Ashley, if you can fight stage 4 pancreatic cancer, then I can go in the cold with a cold”.  Hmm.. I guess. But I’m superwoman doesn’t he know.  😉    I believe in the meds and soup and big beautiful bed with tv although it’s been a long time since I’ve had a cold.  When I get sick, I do it BIG.  Ha ok not funny.  But he’s a guy, typical guy who just cannot chill and it’s day 5 and he’s bad. Ugh.   I feel like I’m getting a little bit too. Not cool man!

How true! Well he won’t chill out in bed but he’s a baby 🙂

I ordered tickets to this country concert next month for a charity and after ordering it said to call this number for a $15 credit.  Normally I ignore all these things and cancel out because I just am not interested.  This time I thought hmm… why not.  I call, give em my info and BAM getting $15 check sent to me. Sweet.  THEN they try to talk me into something else which generally I do the no, no thank you, thanks anyway, still no, please stop asking but this time I listened and decided to try it.  Still not sure what I ordered but what I do know is that it was $1.  I have the info to cancel within 30 days AND I received another $20.  Woohoo!   I mean with the tickets I purchased I paid for the ‘cut the line’ whatever, I don’t like waiting and I paid for the reserved coat check so Tim (if he goes with me? ) will like the perks along with the extra $$ I got back!  Win-win  🙂

Random – I’ve been CrAaaaaving hot chocolate lately.  I mean, maybe the fact that its 30 degrees of COLDNESS out or the fact I like me some sugar every now and then, I don’t know.  I wish I could kick this craving.  It’s trouble.  I know some sweet spots here in DC where it’s just OH MY AH delicious!

Ok well I hope everyone is enjoying this wonderful day where we come together as a country and vote and have the American pride, tomorrow 1/2 of americans will be angry.

Later! 🙂

Philly fun is all done

The beautiful Lisa Niemi Swayze and I yesterday

^This is a picture taken Saturday of Mrs. Swayze and I

Awesome day with a DETROIT LIONS WIN!!!

Well the Philadelphia PurpleStride event was frigid but fabulous.  They said it was to date the biggest purplestride event of the year – cool!  It was a nice time and interesting enough ran into someone I had met at the DC event in June. Though I didn’t meet any Stage 4 people actually I didn’t meet anyone currently fighting pancreatic cancer, but this is pretty normal at these events.  With all this coldness I am so ready to head to Miami! 😉

Today is a total renew day!! With losing an hour I woke up early then one should and mapped out what I needed to get done along with a revised (Ashley’s) regimen.  A little more hardcore boot-camp style of kickin’ cancer. I started the day on my treadmill followed by a wheatgrass detox drink.  I can only juice today and take in as little as possible because I am getting my CT/PET scan tomorrow.  This is exactly what I need anyways!  A nice detox.

I am going to be adding some cooked foods to my diet and of coarse keeping it vegan and gluten free. I LOVE cooking nowadays and trying new recipes!! Ready to try to new things 🙂

Tomorrow:  CT/PET  AKA  figure out what the heck is going on inside my body and why my platelets are flat lined and I can’t get chemo.

Us. NOTE – Tim is NOT flipping off the camera he said he was trying to point at me

Maddie and I approaching the finish line

Maddie and I

Below are a couple pictures of my juices.

Orange – I’m not a grapefruit fan so it’s a bit tangy to me but a fabulous immune boosting drink!

3 Carrots
1/2 Grapefruit
1 Orange

Yum 😉

Green Machine – Not the best tasting but so good for ya!

Kale
Celery
Broccoli
Spinach

Green goodness

Well hello Philly!